If you're anything like us, you remember sitting in school as a kid thinking that the clock on the classroom wall was exacting the most cruel of tortures by moving especially slow in order to keep us indefinitely steeped in a trigonometry lesson. In all likelihood, those clocks weren't out to get anybody, they were just doing their job, ticking away the precious seconds of life as you dealt with complex equations. Perhaps you should be thankful that the clock dealt in such small increments of time, as we couldn't imagine what it would've been like if every classroom had the Life Clock by Bertrand Planes affixed to the wall. This time teller is even less generous with movement as it goes 6,1320 times slower than a regular clock, preferring to tick away the days and years over seconds and hours. So if you manage to hit Forty O'clock more than once that means there have been some great advances in the prolonging of life. Or maybe you'll just be the oldest person in the world.

Telling time is hard. First, you have to remember that the little hand points to the hour; then you have to remember that the big hand tells you what minute it is. It gets even harder when you realize that a great deal of clocks don't even list every minute, so sometimes the big hand hovers between two numbers and you're left to guess the exact time. Oh the humanity! Now, before you get yourself in a tizzy over just what time it is, we think you should take a look at the TikTak from Niels van Eijk and Miriam van der Lubbe. The dutch designers have created a visually arresting clock that leaves no minute to the imagination, as all sixty numbers are arranged in interleaved layers. Resembling something you might find floating in space, each powder coated metal minute arm of this nearly twenty four-inch timepiece is colored a varying degree of gray to display depth. After all, you wouldn't want to confuse your twenty-third minute with your twenty-fourth minute.

Our friends at PopJunkie just dropped three new and badass clocks, and if you order one (as with any of their tshirts or other home accessories) by the end of the week, they promise to have it in your hands of those of someone you love by Christmas — which, in case you’re unaware, is nine shopping days away. I don’t know about you, but any shopping I can do that doesn’t include crowds and crappy customer service is a gift in itself.

You may recall earlier this year when we pointed you in the direction of the tremendous talent that is Paula McCullough, alerting you to her unique brand of puzzle art. Well, Paula is back in our good graces and not a moment too soon. This time she’s not juggling jigsaw pieces, but rather, she’s turned her attentions towards the construction of clockwork. Ms. McCullough has spent just over a year creating a limited edition collection of 60 (out of an eventual 100) clocks whose bases are made from rusty railroad tie plates found buried under overgrown weeds on the abandoned tracks near her home in Stowe, Vermont. These tie plates have welded backs, and serve to float the clock from the wall and protect the clock movement. The bases aren't the only special component of these creations; they are almost entirely resultant of second-hand serendipity as the clock faces were also formed from found objects, making them truly unique tellers of time that are worth discovering for yourself. You may want to hurry though as these displays of duration are sure to disappear into the homes of discriminating chrono-philes before you can say, “time’s up!”

From organizing customized clocks for auction to conceiving customer-participation contests, the Canadian guys at Furni Creations have a nutty second sense for getting us 0-to-60 amped for their modern, skate-inspired house accessories. They're now spreading word about their latest Small Fall collection, with fresh design takes on the people's fave: Furni's high-quality clocks. For the fall season, Barcelona artist Emil Kozak lent his graphics skill to the limited edition Alba-EK desktop alarm clock, and Furni merged shapes from two popular models to form their new Knox. Heads on the go will like the ‘80s digital watch collaboration between Furni and our friends at CoolHunting called Farmer, which is water resistant like your dad’s old retro watch. But because I don't like having tan lines, I’m probably going to order the travel-friendly, delightfully analog, Steven and keep his bro, Arthur on the nightstand. Orders ship mid-October.

Materials: nails, digital clock, metal housing, chrome chain, dead bird. Yes, DEAD BIRD. The folks over at The Watchismo Times have pointed out this one-of-a-kind timepiece. Designer Michael Sans has a unique — to say the least — take on the traditional German cuckoo clock.

The off-handed humor of his rendition is undoubtedly awesome, although the creep factor takes a huge step up when you take into account that the bird has been virtually crucified — not literally, as Sans maintains the bird died of natural causes — on the chrome nails. That is, of course, once you get past the simple fact that there’s a dead bird on your wall. Unfortunately Sans’ design isn’t for sale, but I’m sure if you collaborated with the local taxidermist and watch repair shop, you could probably cobble together something of your own.

So in case you hadn’t figured it out, we’re a wee bit obsessed with clocks around here — not because any of us are necessarily punctual or schedule freaks, but because the design aspect behind timepieces today is so intruiging and innovative. Sometimes they are completely impractical for any normal living situation, impossible to read or will require a heavy black AMEX to purchase, but we love them all most of them, regardless. The Puhlmann Nixie Clock, however, is none of these things: an industrial mix of Nixie vacuum tubes and brushed stainless steel tell the time with a total retro-digital feel. This is the type of piece that could, theoretically, inspire the design of an entire room…or inspire you to, you know, be on time for once in your life.

via Technabob

I have a sad obsession with DIY hacks and, if I had any motivation or attention-span to create my own instead of ripping off stuff I find in Readymade, I may very well have found myself in the Etsy field instead of new media. I had come home from a pre-birthday celebration last week with a beautiful bunch of roses, and in my semi-intoxicated state managed to strip the stems and vase them, but left the leaves and offcuts all over our kitchen counter before I passed out. When I woke up the next morning, my roommate told me she hadn’t cleaned it up because she thought it was another one of my little “projects.”

I didn’t think it was that out of control.

In any case, I just saw that Furni is having a contest through September, wherein they want you to purchase one of their clock kits and hack your own timepiece. The prize? A spot in their next collection, of course. Immediately I thought of ripping off my good friend Eric’s blender lamp, then realized that I’m an idiot because that’s a lamp, and not a clock. Whatever! Go ahead and score yourself a kit, get busy and after you’re done sending them photos of your entry, send them to me…because I’m all about stealing your ideas and passing them off as my own.

Related: Furni’s Artist Clock Auction

Can there be such a thing as a metaclock? And if so, would it have to tell metatime?

If there is any hope of answering these questions empirically, we might find it in the Grandpa Clock at Generate. It looks something like an old-fashioned grandfather clock, but it isn’t. Instead, it’s the image of an old clock, printed on canvas with modern clockworks behind the image doing the actual work. The Grandpa Clock looks like an antique, but it’s obviously not trying to be a realistic reproduction; it’s both a timepiece and a commentary on timepieces. It’s hard to look at it without thinking about what you’re looking at, which is a pretty awesome thing for a clock — the most basic of appliances — to accomplish. How far we’ve come from the noble sundial.

–Dan Steckenberg

I think I might need to get this clock for everyone I know— nobody seems to realize that when I’m in London I’m 5 hours ahead of NYC, 7 hours ahead of Boulder, so calling me at 11pm to see if “I’m out duddde” wakes me up– likely getting my beauty sleep before a big meeting or presentation the next day. This super-sexy Time Zone Clock was made to track jet setters around the world like yours truly. Available in 2 colors, red and white for $58.

Via Swiss Miss

It seems as though we have a “time” theme going today– so who am I to break the trend? This weekend while in Seattle, I found these Bengt Ek Design Clocks while browsing through cooking store Sur La Table. From what I can surmise, these clocks are a product of Swedish design and Swiss craftsmanship– the way they look and feel in your hand backs that up. The clock on the left has super clean yet striking aesthetics, with a solid, brushed metal frame; and the clock on the right has a removable timer below the timepiece so you don’t burn your crumpets. Bengt Ek products are engineered and designed for the kitchen, so it comes as no surprise that they make an array of other kitchen-helpful gadgets– appealing and sound design is stressed throughout their entire range of products. If you’re interested in buying some Bengt Ek online, try either Sur La Table or Scandinavian Design Center. If my memory serves me, each of these clocks goes for around $60.

Information on the mastermind designer behind Pixel Breaker and The Polar Clock is scarce– it looks like he (or she) is a bit of a pixel-pushing superhuman, having done amazing work with Adidas, Panasonic, and more. The Polar Clock is an awesome little flash application (available on the web as a standalone or as a screen saver for OS X or Windows) that tells the date, hour, minutes and seconds in a gorgeous and elegant interface. Check it out– and if anyone knows who this Pixel Breaker character is, please share!

To a lot of us out there five o’clock is the only time in the day that really matters– unless you’re a lawyer, in which case this clock should be probably be called “Midnight O’Clock.” At any rate, the M&Co Five O’Clock was designed by Tibor Kalman, measures 12 inches in diameter, and has an aluminum case and dial, crystal cover, and German quartz movement. Just remember: to avoid pissing off your boss, you best finish all of those TPS Reports before the clock strikes ‘cinco.’

Via Uncrate

The Just a Moment Clock by Reddish design studio is a quirky mix between analog and digital representations of time. Each time component is separated giving the appearance that hours, minutes and seconds are all different time zones. Maybe they’re all different dimensions, or maybe this is just a unique way to look at a clock–either way, I love it.

Everyone is buzzing about the new Furni Artist Clock Auction– and they’re not alone. Furni rallied the participation of artists like James Kerr (left), Cody Hudson, and many more. All the proceeds of the auction go directly to Skate for Cancer. The auction begins Monday February 12th, at 8EST. Great artwork, great clocks, great cause.